P is very cute. I was absolutely infatuated with this boy. He's nerdy, smart, HOT, and absolutely entertaining to hang around. And things seemed to be going successfully. Alas, seeming and being are two different concepts.
After our second or third date I noticed something of a lapse in his interest for me. Instead of abiding by general date policy, he would give me a few run-around lines that suggested hesitation on his part. After a brief text (we will get to the significance of the text message in this relationship in a bit) conversation about the types of guys we generally date, I found out that he likes assertive, dominant men. This same conversation offered a bit of self-enlightenment as well: I am (perceived to) not (be) assertive.
I'm blaming this perception on the text message and lack of contact. We started talking regularly to each through the vehicle of the SMS -- never calling, and rarely seeing each other outside of the occassional, oft-cancelled FORMALass date. How could anyone have a veristic view of anyone else under these misleading conditions?
Granted, I am not the hyper masculine action hero he has dreams about, but still, I'm highly disappointed that whenever I like a guy my personality and behaviorisms seem to automatically become a barrier to any sort of meaningful relationship.
I am reduced to a sigh.
